For a long time I stayed in one place for that very same reason--the risk. I came across this post on instagram. 2017 was a year of endings and beginnings. And I'm better for it. Now, I don't like change because change is usually hard. I don't want to make anymore mistakes, because Lord knows I've made plenty. But I also don't want to live afraid. Most choices I've made out fear ended in regret. And when I leaped, I end up with something valuable, something good. An experience or a creation that didn't exist before. Like studying physics at the University. My high school academic counselor laughed when I said I wanted to go to college and told me I'd never go to college. I remember his name. I should mail him a copy of my degree. Lol. I remember a former co-worker laughed when he found out I declared physics as a major while taking my first pre-algebra class. I remember all the naysayers who warned me of the impossibility of getting published and how they write too or always wanted to write (insert book idea/memoir here), and how everyone they knew who tried, also failed. 

Sometimes you gotta just bite the bullet and do what you want and who cares if you fail. I'm glad to say that at least this I am good at. Just doing the things I want. 

Regret over "what if" (i.e. not doing) is far more greater. 

I want to add that I also remember the good voices. Like the people who believed in my writing when it was still new and really, really sucked. And like the academic counselor who didn't bat an eye when I said I wanted to study astronomy. I asked her what I do? She took out a thick book and flipped through it and read passages and thought for a few minutes and then said, "You have to major in physics." I said okay and where do I start. She said, "You have to take a lot of math." Lol. And I did. 

So anyway, my point is if you don't take any risk, you'll never get anything more than what you were always going to have. 

I'm finally beating this cold. I'm still sick but I'm through the worst of it. I made more chicken soup. This time I made it more brothy with bok choy and shirataki noodles. The soup was yummy.

This was one hell of a cold. Even my eyeballs were sick. A headache that wouldn't go away. Stuffy head. Cough. But! I still made my deadline. 👊🏽

Tonight is TV nite!!! Star Trek Discovery, Supernatural, and The Walking Dead. 

Side note, "bat an eye" or "batting an eye" is also a weird expression. 

Source.

"without batting an eye. Showing no emotion, acting as though nothing were unusual."